Did you watch the Super Bowl last night? I didn't, so I can't tell you about the game — I know Madonna was involved; oh, and probably football — but I do know one thing: another Super Bowl, another barrage of commercials for upcoming big-screen blockbusters.
The Super Bowl is traditionally one of the highest-rated television events of the year, and you can bet all of Hollywood's major studios see it as a perfect chance to get trailers for their forthcoming big-budget tent pole properties in front of every possible set of eyes. Of course, at a price of $3 million for a 30-second spot, they pay dearly for the opportunity. But pay they did. These previews each run more than a minute, so you do the obscenely overpriced math.
Here are the trailers from three of the most-anticipated flicks around the Planet Fury offices; that is, two of the most-anticipated flicks and Battleship. (Oooh, snap!)
First up, coming May 4, is Joss Whedon's star-studded superhero gang bang team-up The Avengers, which finds Samuel L. Jackson's muthafuckin' Nick Fury bringing together muthafuckin' Marvel favorites Iron Man, Thor, the Hulk, Black Widow, Captain America and Hawk Eye (whose work here, I suppose, is an audition for his own flick) to fight muthafuckin' Loki, Thor's muthafuckin' nemesis who apparently wants to rule the muthafuckin' world. Does anyone else think it's weird that Nick Fury wears his eye patch strap under his ear?
Next, we have John Carter, Disney's high-dollar attempt to bring to life Edgar Rice Burroughs' classic fantasy series in which a former Confederate soldier ends up on Mars, without the expected complications ("Wow, I can breathe!") but with unexpected complications ("A civil war? Dammit, I just fought one of those!"). It's also an attempt to bring to life Taylor Kitsch, who is pretty and all but has never really leapt off the screen for me (but this is in 3D, so that could change). It looks epic and sweeping, but also more than a little derivative. (Really? A nod to Braveheart, complete with blue paint?) Opens March 9. See it for Kitsch if you love him; see it for Lynn Collins if you don't.
Finally, there's Battleship, director Peter Berg's dip into the ol' Hasbro toy box. Opening May 18, Battleship stars Liam Neeson, Rhianna, Alexander Skarsgård and Taylor Kitsch (I guess Channing Tatum was busy). I played this game countless times as a kid, but I still don't remember aliens being involved. No matter how many ways they spin this flick, the only similarity it has to the game on which it's based is the title. Granted, there are battleships too. As I've said before, the only chance this movie has with me is if Neeson gets to deliver the "you sunk my battleship" line to an extraterrestrial. (I wonder if Hasbro plans to release a movie tie-in edition of the game that involves aliens…or Rhianna...or Channing Tatum; that dude is everywhere lately.)
The JOHN CARTER marketing is just not connecting. It reminds me of GREEN LANTERN, which desperately tried to put together a coherent trailer and failed. That movie ate shit at the box office and I think JOHN CARTER will do the same.
Also, I'm sure at some point they'll regret dropping ...OF MARS from the title. Dumb idea.
The JOHN CARTER marketing is just not connecting. It reminds me of GREEN LANTERN, which desperately tried to put together a coherent trailer and failed. That movie ate shit at the box office and I think JOHN CARTER will do the same.
Also, I'm sure at some point they'll regret dropping ...OF MARS from the title. Dumb idea.
Oh, and THE AVENGERS looks sweet.
I totally agree on all points. But, to be fair, Green Lantern was just painful. John Carter might be better (it'd be hard not to be) but, yeah, the trailers are all over the map.
__________________
A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it's not open.
Green Lanter ate so much shit it got a sequel green lit after a few days of release. It may have been lousey...but it did well enough at the box office.
Green Lanter ate so much shit it got a sequel green lit after a few days of release. It may have been lousey...but it did well enough at the box office.
Just barely. Sure, it grossed about $220 million, but it cost $200 million to make. When you factor in advertising costs, it likely didn't pay for itself in box office returns. Warner Bros president Jeff Robinov agreed to a sequel provided there are major changes made for round two...such as making the next flick good.
__________________
A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it's not open.
Did you watch the Super Bowl last night? I didn't, so I can't tell you about the game — I know Madonna was involved; oh, and probably football — but I do know one thing: another Super Bowl, another barrage of commercials for upcoming big-screen blockbusters.
The JOHN CARTER marketing is just not connecting. It reminds me of GREEN LANTERN, which desperately tried to put together a coherent trailer and failed. That movie ate shit at the box office and I think JOHN CARTER will do the same.
Also, I'm sure at some point they'll regret dropping ...OF MARS from the title. Dumb idea.
Oh, and THE AVENGERS looks sweet.