Woot woot! That's right everybody, it's the REMAKE RANT TRAIN coming to bitch and moan about another movie that's going to be ruined by Hollywood. This time, every horror fan on my Newsfeed is sending 'Go West Frodo' signs to Elijah Wood, who has recently been cast as Frank Zito in the Maniac remake. By the way, 'Go West' also means die for those who didn't last past the 3 hour mark during The Return of the King.
Cast alongside Wood is Nora Arnezeder ...who is French, while remake king Alexander Aja and Gregory Levasseur will produce and pen the screenplay, leaving P2 director Frank Khalfoun in the director's chair. No word yet on who will play all those hookers.
William Lustig's gritty and grotesque film Maniac survives as a bit of a cult classic today. It follows the tragic story of Frank Zito, a fat Italian guy who kills and scalps women so that he can thumbtack their hair onto mannequins and then snuggle with them (the mannequins that is). In short--- Maniac is awesome. So what exactly is Elijah Wood doing in the role? Beats me.
Oh wait I might know. Typically remakes try to do one of two things. They either A. Try to be the same exact movie that we love or B. try to put a new spin on a movie that we love. Since Elijah Wood is not a fat Italian man, I'm going to venture a guess that this Maniac remake is heading down route B. And with good reason. First of all it has to because New York is no longer the putrid and crime infested land that it was in 1980. Second of all, remakes need to broaden their horizons and actually become their own movie.
Sure, Frodo Baggins isn't exactly a serial killer, but you know who is? Kevin from Sin City.
Also, remember when Elijah Wood stole Kate Winslet's underwear in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? Creep city. And how could we forget that devious soul playing the vintage video game in Back to the Future II?
What an asshole! My point is, that like every other actor in Hollywood---Elijah Wood is well....an actor. Just because he played a hobbit one time doesn't mean he is one in real life.
Does Maniac really need to be remade? Probably not. But like I've said a million times, can we stop them from doing it? No. So why don't we shut up and wait until movies actually get made before we hate them? Or better idea---stop caring in general. The original will always be there for us to come back to, so stop acting like it's dead. It's not, it's just scalped and thumbtacked on a mannequin.
