Lindsay Lohan As Sharon Tate? Gross.

I recently heard that Lindsay Lohan had been offered the role of Sharon Tate in an upcoming film about the Manson Clan.

When I had heard this, I silently prayed it was a joke that some mean spirited person had dreamt up while setting fire to a box of hamsters. Not that I want someone to do that but when I imagine someone really, really mean, the words “killing hamsters” always comes to mind…

Anyways guess what? That rumor is true. According to several sources, Lohan was offered the role after photographer Tyler Shields reportedly said that he would love to have her play Sharon Tate in his Manson clan movie, Eyes of a Dreamer. Lohan has not accepted or declined the offer because she’s too busy stealing expensive necklaces and figuring out which fashionable burlap sack makes her look less attractive. Eyes of a Dreamer will be the third movie about the Manson clan to come out within the next few years and will star Shields who will playing Charles Manson.

First of all—gross, second of all….really? Sharon Tate?! Look, I’ll be up front with you all. I am straight—but every time I see a picture of Sharon Tate, I can’t help but feel a little happy in my pants. When I watched The Fearless Vampire Killers I officially decided that she was one of the most beautiful people in the world. Do you know what I feel when I look at Lindsay Lohan? I feel sick, like I’ve stumbled into the wrong crack head’s den, sick. Sick like I’m going to vomit all over my cat and then cry and break something, sick. I definitely do NOT feel happy in my pants. Although, I guess we should be thankful that this isn't one of the hopefully good films about the Manson Clan.

Not to burst even more bubbles, but I’ve also read that Lindsay headed to Los Angeles today to audition for the new Superman film. Apparently she is up for a role as one of the villains which she probably landed because she showed true brilliance as a bitchy high schooler (that’s not a joke, she was actually brilliant in Mean Girls). Seriously though stop offering Lindsay Lohan roles in major films. Let’s see if maybe she can get her act together first. Casting Lohan in a film that is already a little shaky is not going to do anything good, except give it Razzie nominations.